literature

Burning Snow

Deviation Actions

DrSurgeonGuy's avatar
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Published:
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Literature Text

The rising of black
doesn't kill the snow.
The forest goes crack
with each fiery glow.

The flames don't hold back,
alive as the snow down low.
Both crawling like plaque
towards a village not in the know.

Not a soul flees in fright,
all the dogs lay lame.
On the darkest of night,
all the living were tame.
It all ended in white,
under our Lady of Flame.
© 2014 - 2024 DrSurgeonGuy
Comments5
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Norrolith's avatar
The first stanza was a little too vague I think. I am assuming black is either night or blackened wood.
The second stanza shares a bit of the first ones faults but is better. Why is the snow below? is the fire in the canopy?
Rising makes me thinks it's on the ground.
The final part is the best in my opinion. it has imagery that is clear and compelling, and takes advantage of the mood set up in the previous stanzas.
Overall very good, I am probably still too literalistic.